How To Help My Little One Overcome The Absence Of His Father

For years we have been taught that the ideal family is made up of a father, mother and children, but what happens when the family is not complete? What happens if the father figure is gone?

If you are in that situation, you may ask yourself: how can I help my little one overcome the absence of his father? Here we will give you some recommendations.

The myths of the ideal family

The concept and composition of the perfect family is something that has been ingrained in society for a long time.

In fact, even today there are many who believe that if the father is absent at home, children will grow up uninspired and have emotional problems during their development, but nothing could be further from the truth.

A family can coexist fully, without inconvenience, even if Dad is absent. In general, the little ones turn out to be the most affected in these cases, they feel judged, incomplete, different or alone.

Helping your little one overcome the sadness and grief over the absence of his father should be a priority for you.

There are several reasons why the father could be missing in a family, all of them with consequences and impacts for the little one, an unfriendly separation or a tragic death could separate the father figure from his son.

In any case, it is important that the child knows the truth, the reason for the absence, only then will he be able to overcome it better.

Why isn’t your father here?

Expressing to your little one with the right words that his father will not come to pick him up from school, or that he will not arrive today or tomorrow to play can be particularly difficult, especially since his absence also affects mother, whether she wants it or not.

Everything that affects a child affects us as mothers, as women

If dad is absent because he has died, the feelings that a child can experience are very confusing, anger, frustration and despair prevail inside.

If your disappearance is due to a divorce, your absence may be intermittent, making it disconcerting for a child.

In another scenario, the father figure may be non-existent before the birth of his offspring.

A man who did not take responsibility can leave negative traces on a child if measures are not taken in time.

Guiding, guiding, but above all communicating with your son so that he understands that his father is not there is essential.

It is not an easy task, much less if your child is already at the age where he asks multiple questions, but as he grows up he will understand what is happening around him, even if he does not accept it or it seems fair.

Tips to help your little one overcome the absence of his father

• Your child needs support, someone to trust and to whom he can talk. Be that person who helps him understand.
• Don’t let the circumstances that led to your dad missing you make him feel self-conscious or ashamed.
• Not living with his dad doesn’t make him a freak.
• Explain that it is not his fault, whatever happened. In most divorce cases, children often feel guilty about what happened. Explain that these are differences between adults that were not caused by him.
• Anger and inappropriate behaviors can be reactions that stem from not understanding the absence of his father, but make it clear that even if he feels frustrated, it is not okay to rebel.

• Help him to let go, to release everything that hurts him and generates emotional discomfort. Do not hesitate to go to a therapist if you consider it necessary.
• Forgiveness is the magic word if your child did not know his father because he simply disappeared. Teach him not to stagnate and keep moving forward.

Forgiveness will allow you to heal your wounds

Remind him how much you love and care for him, without expecting anything in return. Let her know that you will always be a proud mother.

A father figure is important, no doubt, but its absence does not have to mark the destiny of your little one in a negative way. If you help your child overcome it, it will not be a determining factor in his life.

Grandparents, uncles and even a new partner can serve as role models and complement their upbringing, but it will be the teachings and values ​​that you provide that will shape their character.